Book Two: Inescapable, #2 Read online

I look at his animated face, the excitement exuding from his body and I can’t do it. Not right now. I can’t utter the words that might possibly cause us to lose this account, take away his joy...

  Or deal with his emotional response while I’m still whirling and trying to grasp my own.

  What Borden and I had was in the past and I needed to keep it there, at least for the night. I need to have time to put it all in perspective, that it was one night that didn’t mean anything. After all, Borden and I don’t really know each other, the truth was we never did. I would talk to Borden when I see him again, discuss with him whether it was for the best that we keep that one night to ourselves. Keeping the past in the past would be best for Tyler...best for Borden’s steady girlfriend, Sharon.

  God, why did it hurt so much when I think of him being with someone else?

  Then shaking my head, I firmly convince myself, - The past was the past.

  So, forcing myself to smile, I say instead, “Congratulations on landing your first major account.”

  Smiling widely in return, winking at me, Tyler says softly, “I’ll be right back.”

  My legs feel like jelly as I collapse onto the sofa, still unable to shake the feeling that I feel like someone else.

  Tyler returns from the kitchen with two glasses of wine. Handing a glass to me, he lightly clinks his glass to mine as he sits next to me, saying, “Cheers.”

  Then laying his glass on the coffee table, he sweeps my feet up into his lap, removing my high heels before he gently starts massaging. Tears blur my eyes, guilt eating away at me as I watch his strong hands ply my skin, trying his best to erase some of the tension from me.

  “You’ve been so tense all day today, Cass, and definitely not yourself. But now that you’ve secured the client, you can relax now. Your meeting is over and we have the account. He will sign the contract tonight and then we move forward,” he murmurs softly. “You did good.”

  I take a sip of my wine, avoiding his eyes as I continue to watch his hands working on my feet.

  I can do this, - I silently convince myself. It was a long time ago. Don’t let it interfere with your future.

  Tyler’s hands slowly make their way up my legs, gently massaging but I know their intent and I silently beg him to stop but feel too guilty to actually stop him. As he reaches the hem of my dress, he slides his hands underneath, continuing until he’s rubbing between the apex of my thighs. I squeeze my eyes shut, forcing myself not to turn him away because he doesn’t deserve it. As he grasps the waistband of my underwear, I passively allow him to push them down and off my legs. As he grasps both of my forearms, gently guiding me to a lying position on the sofa, I don’t resist. I continue to keep my eyes closed as I feel him prod between my legs and then he’s sliding up and into me. He rocks back and forth, his groans letting me know that I’m doing a good job.

  Of pretending.

  He doesn’t suspect a thing.

  After a few minutes, I feel him erupt and then he’s relaxing on top of me.

  But I feel like I’m smothering.

  I gasp for air, breathing heavily, my chest hurting. He mistakes it for my orgasm as he chuckles into my neck before gyrating into me once more.

  Finally, he lifts himself from me and I quickly sit up.

  I’ve never felt so hollow.

  Empty.

  “I’m going to grab a shower,” I whisper, needing a break to get my head back on straight.

  Standing, I escape to our ensuite, where I quickly tear my clothing from my body before stepping under the hot shower. Tears mingle with the water as I glance down between my legs to where Tyler had made his mark on me.

  My body feels foreign, out of touch with my head, as it screams at me that I shouldn’t have allowed that to happen. Angry with myself, I roughly wash my skin, before aiming the shower head between my legs.

  I close my eyes.

  Tears now dripping down my face.

  What the fuck, Cass? - I silently scream.

  Now the anger turns to frustration as I turn off the water. I quickly dry myself before wrapping the towel tightly around me. As I step into the bedroom, Tyler is in bed, waiting for me with both glasses of wine placed on his night stand. I hastily swipe up my night shirt from where I left it on the bed this morning, neatly folded, feeling like I’m exposed – naked and raw - as I drop my towel to quickly pull it over my head.

  Crossing to the bed, I quickly climb underneath.

  Tyler hands me my wine glass but I shake my head as I say, “I just brushed my teeth and I’m really tired.”

  His concerned gaze roves over my face as he asks, “Are you okay? You don’t seem yourself and I expected you to be excited with this account.”

  I need to get myself together better than this.

  “It’s been a long day and this account is adding a little more stress than I expected,” I murmur, telling a half-truth instead of the full-truth.

  Tyler chuckles as he says consolingly, “Hey, I get you being a little star struck. He’s an A-lister for sure, but you’ve got this. I have no doubt you’ll be terrific.”

  I look at his face, feeling shame...

  Guilt.

  Reaching out my hand, knowing he deserves better than having a girlfriend who is thinking about someone else, I place it on his cheek as I reply softly, “Good night, Tyler.”

  He leans over and softly kisses me and my heart tears a little. As he moves away, I turn on my side, facing away from him. I stare across the room at the wall until he turns off his light, but I don’t fall asleep.

  Instead, I stare into the blackness of the space before me as I replay, over and over again, how it felt to have Borden hold me again.

  He had felt so right, – my mind and my heart whispers.

  A deep ache throbs deeply in my chest.

  It’s hours later that my mind finally allows me to fall into a deep sleep, one that’s filled with memories.

  I remember in my dreams how I’d kissed Borden for the first time.

  How his breath had caught...

  My mind, along with my body, remembering once again his whispered words.

  Feeling and tasting them as if he was so very real and with me now...

  “I know I don't know you, but I want you. So bad.”

  My body yearns, burning in my disjointed sleep, remembering...

  Feeling so very alive even as I sleep.

  When I slowly come to wakefulness in the morning, my head feels cloudy, my body flushed.

  And then a jolt of sadness overwhelms me as I realize it was all just a dream, a memory...

  One that I never wanted to wake up from, - I silently acknowledge as I stare once again across the bedroom at the same wall I had stared at last night.

  If I lay here, if I just lay here, could I will myself back to that dream?

  I feel so twisted...torn...aroused.

  I feel Tyler’s hand snake over my waist and I tense, praying that this morning he’s only looking for a touch.

  “You did a lot of moaning last night in your sleep. Anything I can help you out with?” Tyler whispers suggestively into my ear as his hand splays over my stomach, pressing me back into his hardon.

  I close my eyes, a tear escaping as I roughly whisper, “A bad dream.”

  Tyler’s hand moves from my stomach, to come up to push my hair away from my neck. Leaning forward, he kisses my neck softly as he whispers, “I’m sorry about the bad dream but I have something here to chase it away.” He flips me onto my back, continuing to kiss my neck as he reaches down to slide his finger into and out of me.

  “Hmmm...someone’s very wet,” he murmurs appreciatively into my neck.

  Then before I can stop him, he’s on top of me, pressing himself into me, moaning pleasurably as he sinks deeply into me, never suspecting that my dreams of Borden are what had made his path into my body so easy. With my mind still desperately seeking to relive my memories that had been brought to the surface from my dreams, my body desp
erate to feel so alive again as it once had with Borden, I close my eyes and pretend.

  Again...

  Instead of wrapping my arms around Tyler, knowing that he won’t feel the same, won’t fit so right as Borden, I clutch the bedsheets in my hands and keep my eyes closed. With my dreams still reverberating in my mind, I also allow myself to remember how Borden had clasped his hands in mine, his hair falling around us, his intense stare as he pushed himself into me...

  Completely losing control, taking me with him.

  I bite my lip, my back arching as I lose myself to the memory.

  As Tyler’s weight crashes down on me, I’m shocked back to reality and I’m left gasping.

  “Sorry,” I hear Tyler murmur as a chuckled apology into my neck. “I got a little over excited at your response and got a little carried away.”

  Tyler’s whispered apology spears my heart.

  I’d let myself think...crave...for someone else.

  I stare up at the ceiling, Tyler’s weight still on top of me, feeling remorseful for allowing any of that to happen. When Tyler finally lifts himself from me, climbing from our bed to hold his hand out to help me, I can’t meet his eyes. But he doesn’t suspect anything, thankfully, as he pulls me into the shower with him.

  As we go through our morning ritual of getting ready for work, I remain quiet, only responding to Tyler’s questions, his excitement thankfully obscuring my torment as I wonder how I was going to cope having to work with Borden.

  Arriving at work, Tyler asks me to meet him for lunch at 12:30, and then finally - thankfully, I can escape to my office. I desperately need time alone, time to pull myself together.

  As I close my office door, I lean against it and sigh deeply.

  My heart is aching.

  For me, for Tyler - for Borden.

  Throwing myself into my work, I spend the morning contacting several television and radio shows, making appointments for me to attend to begin the discussion of special appearances by Borden. Then I move onto forming an initial launch schedule along with step-by-step details of what we need to have done before the big announcement to launch his new solo career on the right track.

  I completely lose track of time until Tyler texts me, asking where I am. I’d completely forgotten about our lunch date and it was now 12:45.

  Sending him a quick apology by text, I grab my purse and head out the door, notifying the receptionist along the way that I’ll be back in time for my meeting at 1:30 with Borden.

  Ignoring the sudden butterflies that have appeared at the mention of my upcoming meeting with Borden, I step onto the elevator. Leaning back against the wall, I close my eyes.

  Borden, - my mind whispers.

  My heart flutters, tripping a beat.

  I can’t wait to see him today, - I allow myself that small admission.

  God, my emotions are all over the place.

  The elevator door dings before sliding open, bringing me out of my trance. I step out, my mood switching to one of lightness as I think of seeing Borden later today, and smiling wider than usual at the security guard who is holding the door open for me at the exit, I ask, “How are you today, Steve?”

  “Good miss, good,” he says as he smiles widely in return as I walk past him. “You sure do have a twinkle in your eyes today, miss.”

  His words startle me.

  Guilt starts to eat away at me again as I walk the short distance to our usual lunch spot. Seeing Tyler, who is perusing his menu at a table that he managed to secure outside, my eyes run over the top of his head, the breadth of his shoulders, his strong hands as I walk toward him.

  He lifts his head, and without warning, my mind silently and unexpectantly antagonizes me, - Why have I never felt an inexplicable yearning for you Tyler?

  Guilt swamps me, and yet again, I avoid his warm welcoming eyes as I slide into my chair.

  “Hey,” he says in welcome and thankfully he goes back to perusing the menu as he continues, “How was your morning?” In his world, everything is the same as it was yesterday.

  Before Borden.

  If given the chance, would I take back my world as it had been before yesterday, before Borden had sauntered back into it?

  I know the answer.

  I know I wouldn’t change a thing.

  I pause for a moment as I swallow the lump of remorse in my throat before replying, “Good.”

  He looks up from the menu, his gaze coming to mine and I force myself to hold his stare as he asks, “Everything ok?”

  “Yes,” I reply a little too quickly, dropping his gaze.

  “You sure?” I hear him ask.

  Nodding, picking up my menu and pretending a great interest in it, I change the subject as I manage to ask, “Have you decided yet?”

  The words on the menu blur a little as I hear Tyler respond, “I’m thinking about the Cobb Salad.”

  Nodding my head, I swallow thickly, keeping my eyes on the menu as I try to compose myself. Finally, I’m able to respond, “I’ll have the same thing.”

  The waitress arrives and Tyler places our order, thankfully giving me a few more seconds to get myself together.

  As the waitress turns to walk away, Tyler’s focus comes back to me and mercifully he doesn’t detect anything as he asks for more details about my morning and the public relation strategy that I’d outlined on paper this morning. He’s extremely pleased with the plans so far.

  “Borden is going to love working with you once he gets to know you. You have such a brilliant mind for this PR business,” Tyler compliments me.

  Picking up my water glass, I take a sip and swallow thickly.

  I feel so much guilt.

  As Ty and I begin the walk back to the office after our lunch meeting, my emotions are still swinging wildly out of control and all over the place as the guilt becomes mixed with a deep inner, uncontrollable and nervous excitement at our impending meeting with Borden.

  I know I shouldn’t feel this way for someone other than Ty.

  I know that it’s completely wrong...

  But the excitement is overwhelmingly zinging through my body

  As Ty presses the button to the elevator to take us back to the tenth floor in our office building, I firmly tell myself to get myself under control. That Borden is just like any other account.

  The past was the past.

  “Hey,” I hear the voice that has been haunting me since yesterday afternoon say behind me - that I’ve been secretly yearning to hear all day – just as the elevator dings signaling its arrival.

  My stomach flips, then flops.

  And heat flows, like smooth molten liquid, low in my belly...

  “Hey Borden,” I hear Ty say in an eager and welcoming tone.

  I close my eyes briefly, composing myself.

  Turning, determined to give Borden a bright professional smile, I forget all of my good intentions as my eyes collide with his. He looks so good, so utterly sexily handsome that I forget all thoughts as my hungry eyes take in his equally hungry eyes.

  I feel my nipples swell and harden, a hot wetness between my legs, and I quickly drop my eyes from him. The elevator doors slide open and I have to force myself to concentrate on not falling over as I step forward, onto the waiting elevator on shaking and quivering legs.

  I can still remember the sexy, sensual taste of him, - my mind whispers its taunt.

  Forcefully focusing my attention on the floor, I turn to face the elevator door as Borden and Ty take their places on either side and slightly behind me. My heart races, threatening to rip from my chest, as Borden’s nearness plays with my heart...

  My body and soul.

  I squeeze my eyes shut again, needing to take a moment to calm my erratic and unforgiving body, knowing neither one can see me as Ty says, “Cass and I just met to discuss in detail some of the things she’s managed to get into place this morning. I’m sure you’ll be impressed.”

  There is a slight pause before Borden responds softly, �
�Cass has already fascinated and impressed me with her talents.”

  My eyes fly open, my cheeks burning a fiery red, as I seek to inhale the now suffocating air of the elevator.

  Thankfully, Ty doesn’t pick up on the insinuation as the door slides open to the elevator, delivering us to the correct floor. I quickly step out, the spike on the heel of my shoe catching in the grooves between the elevator and the elevator shaft. I stumble and I feel a hand touch the small of my back to steady me. I don’t need to look to see who it is. I can tell by the burning, searing sensation through my thin blouse that it was Borden.

  “Careful,” he murmurs softly, so very close to my ear and I instantly remember him as he took me from behind that one night so very long ago, whispering in my ear, - I’m going to cum in you.

  Shocked - feeling guilty - I move away from Borden, wanting desperately to reach out and steady myself with the wall.

  How was I going to get through this?

  Somehow, I manage to stay upright all the way to my office, my body burning at Borden’s nearness, the imprint from his hand, his remembered whispered words, all still searing straight through my soul.

  “I’ll meet you in the conference room in a few minutes,” I manage to squeak out as I reach the door to my office.

  Not waiting for a response from either of them, I open the door and quickly shut it behind me before leaning against it. I desperately needed this moment to compose myself. Leaning my head back against the door, I take a few deep and shaky breaths.

  “I will get through this,” I try to convince myself, saying it aloud hoping that my body, my brain, would understand my command.

  Pushing myself away from the door, I drop my purse on my desk and quickly snatch the papers I’d printed off before lunch from my desk. Heading back to the door, I straighten my shoulders, preparing myself for this upcoming meeting.

  You’ve got this. Don’t let the past, that meaningless night, interfere with the here and now, - I silently, and sternly, tell myself as I head towards the conference room.

  But as I enter the room, both men’s eyes come to me, but it’s Borden’s - watching me- that makes me tremble...

  Sending a quiver straight through the very soul of me.

  My eyes take in where they have chosen to sit across the table from one another, forcing me to sadistically choose. I know where I want to sit, feel the pull of it, but I force my steps towards Ty’s side and cautiously slip into the chair next to him.